Thursday, May 13, 2010

The Closet


It's that time of year again.......the time in which I walk into my closet and begin to stare down my clothes as if to say "I'm ready for a fight!"

And it doesn't matter what type of mood I walk into my closet with, undoubtedly my mood will become frustration, hopelessness, or downright anger. I can't help it. It's the time of year when the summer clothes start to come out and I have to look at the same clothes that I have been wearing for years now.....pathetic, right?

So go get a new wardrobe! Throw out the old clothes! Go shopping!
Two problems with that theory............
First off, I'm attached.....white shorts, comfortable, still fit well, so what if they've gotten a bit thin from all of the washing (yes, I wear underwear - white underwear!) tank top, comfortable, still fits well, not really black anymore, strings hanging skirt, comfortable, still fits well (when I iron it, hate to iron!), more of a gray color now, doesn't really match anything else, unless I wear my not-so-black-anymore tank top.

Second problem with the new wardrobe theory........I'm picky when it comes to wouldn't guess that by the description of my attached clothes!....but it's true. When I bring myself to go shopping, it will take me literally, 3 hrs to decide on 1 shirt, I'm not kidding. By the time I have looked at each rack about 5 times over, picked a basket full to try on, tried on everything and hated each one (all the while thinking what can I wear under them to suck in the roly-poly belly or what can I cover the new clothes with to hide what I don't like - which takes away from the point of buying new clothes - ugh!!), I finally emerge from the clothing store with 1 shirt that will hang in my closet with the tag still on because when I got it home, I didn't like it after all!

It is too much of a you know how many clothes I have that I've bought on the spur-of-the-moment impulse because I didn't want to go through the aching task of decision-making? And where are those clothes? Hanging in my closet, never to be worn or taken back to the store (I would have to choose a different item of clothing then)?

I think if I threw out everything from my closet that I don't wear, I would have maybe, 5 or 6 pieces of clothing that actually get worn on a regular basis. Maybe subconsciously I think if I walk into a closet full of clothes, an outfit that looks stunning, modern, and put together, will magically appear before me! NOT!

I remember watching this show about a celebrity (of course), who had gone to see a woman that specializes in "life management"! By the way, how is this a specialty? Where do they give a degree in life management?

Anyway, this celebrity tells the specialist that she needs a nanny, a housekeeper, a dog-walker, a cook, and a driver - and "oh yeah, I need someone to go shopping and pick out clothes for me because that is just too much for me to do" WHAT??? You can pay someone to do that?? Is that possible?? I would have no problem admitting I need help in this area.....I don't care if people think it's ridiculous or a waste of money, or even narcissistic! All I kept thinking during the rest of the show was how to find the money in my budget (what's that??) in order to get me one of those shop-for-me-dress-me people! I then had to settle myself down and realize that this was a hopeless dream and there was a reason I was watching a "celebrity" hire all of this help and not an every-day mom like myself. Dream-crushed....oh well....where was that reality again? Oh yeah, back in the closet.

Maybe sharing this will inspire me to finally get in there and take out all of the shirts that don't fit or look wrong for some reason, all of the pants that have shrunk and are now floods on these long legs of mine, and all of the dresses that have made their way into too many pictures over the years ("Look mom, you're wearing the same dress as this picture from 8 years ago!"), and don't even get me started on the costume jewelry laying in my drawers!!

So, into the closet I go.........and out walks the frustrated and angry woman in her white shorts and black tank top for the 10th year running!! :)


Shanna L said...

God girl this problem truly sounds like me!!!I need to clean out my closet but I know if I do I won't have any clothes left. But I don't wear half of them and have'nt in years. I have been wearing the same clothes for years. When I do go shopping I'm picky and it takes me hours to pick out maybe one outfit! I try to buy a complete outfit when I do go clothes shopping for myself, because I know it will be a new shirt but the same old bottoms and no telling when I will go shopping for myself again!!

Candace said...

Thanks for the comment Shanna!
Isn't that crazy? I'm betting that if we polled most women, we would wind up with the exact same story......and half-empty closets!
But no doubt, we have no problem shopping for our kids :)


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